Mommy Friends

My baby has made me socially disabled. For reals. I *used* to be able to make new friends easily. I've asked guys out before. I'm not what you might call shy. But, I have not been able to make new mommy friends. We took a couple baby classes ("Prepared Childbirth, my ass), but didn't "connect" with anyone. And by didn't "connect", I mean its possible I stuttered. Or just stared stupidly. Or smiled that awkward kinda smile usually reserved for first-grade school pictures. Run into an obviously new mom at the grocery store, with a similarly sized bundle o'squalling joy? Grimace/smile weakly and hurry past.
Sooo.. Tomorrow I am checking out a new mom's group at the local library. And I am NERVOUS. Mentally going through my closet, should I do my nails nervous. I'm still not sure why - is this a byproduct of chronic sleep deprivation? My less-than-daily showering schedule? The fact that none of my clothes really fit the same? Or is my baby, in a sneaky attempt to hoard my attention, secretly sabotaging my attempts? I have witnesses (ok, one witness) that my kid's OCA (Only Child Alert) is primed and ready for any sign of affection between his parents. (True Story: to figure out if our stirring child is going to settle back down, my husband will kiss me. 90% of the time (its possible I made up that number), the baby immediately starts to cry). So maybe he also has a SAMR (socially awkward mama ray) he bings at me when I meet other people? I guess we will see.. Wish me luck!

Why Grown-ups Need Sleep Too

*This is an actual argument we had while watching G play with the animals hanging from the toy bar on his bouncer.*
"That dinosaur doesn't look very menacing."
"That's because it's a giraffe."
"It has scales."
"That's a mane."
"Those are scales."
"That's a lion hanging there with it. Why would a lion be hanging out with a dinosaur?"
"Why would a lion be hanging out with a giraffe?"
"It's a giraffe."
"What's that thing in the middle?"
"I don't know.. an amoeba? It didn't come with the set. It was a gift from [a friend]. It's his favorite though."
"Those are scales."
"It's a giraffe!"
"Well, the lion could take the dinosaur anyways, because it's a herbivore."
"Are all imaginary dinosaurs herbivores, or just that one?"
"Shut up."
"What about the amoeba? Can it take out the imaginary dinosaur too?"
"Shut up."